A week’s-worth of strange things
Yesterday I got on the T. There were no available seats, so I stood holding the dangly-thingy. A middle-aged man seated in front of me said “You can have this seat.”
“No, no I’m fine, thank you though!” I said.
“Really,” he said, getting up. “You can sit on my lap.”
I was visibly horrified, completely shocked that this stranger, who at first appearance seemed perfectly normal, would be so forward and perverse.
There was an elder gentleman to the right of the now-vacant seat, who’s horror seemed to match my own until his wrinkles dissolved into a broad, crinkled grin. “You thought he said ‘You can sit on my lap’ too!” he said, guffawing. “He said ‘He can sit on my lap.’” The older gentleman pointed to the man, who was now picking up his small son on the other side of the train, and placing the boy on his lap.
A large portion of the train heard the whole thing, including the middle-aged man’s wife, and were eventually all laughing. It was great.
Then the older man turned to me once again, and asked, “Is that the first offer you’ve had today?”
“Why, yes,” I said. “Though most days I try to get two or three by noon time.”
Here are some videos for your enjoyment:
This guy fakes an orgasm eating a sandwich, “When Harry Met Sally”-style, to try and win free deli meat for a year.
Have you ever felt tempted to give a subway performer money to STOP playing music until your train comes?
This is a terrible vid., because I didn’t want to be obvious that I was filming this lady. I just thought it was so ironic to hear someone with a very thick accent sing a song like John Denver’s “Take Me Home, Country Road.” In any case, she followed with a Japanese song, which I had to admit was pretty cool.
